As an adult ADD, and I’ve survived a lot; elementary school through
graduate school; office jobs that didn’t last, and high stress construction labor.
I’ve survived business on my own; struggling solo with every role; bottom to
top; you name it.
You know how hard it is in third-grade, but try 1953. They didn’t know learning disabilities back then. I had to stay after school one day to finish an arithmetic test. After 10 minutes I had to take a paddling; a swat for every problem I hadn’t finished. I had 10 problems to go when the bell rang. 10 minutes later, this frightened kid had 9. When I got home Mom and Dad did nothing about it. After all, I was a bright boy, and should have done better.
There’s more; the attitudes I experienced from teachers, mob bullying, my lack of friends and fights; oh, the fights. A black eye on my high school campus was usually mine, or I probably administered it.
I survived a 30-year self-imposed “exile” from my high school community because of my pain and; yes, embarrassment at my memories; but I’m back. I’ve reconnected with my surrogate siblings. Not surprisingly; but unfortunately; some of their memories center on our fights or on how they treated me. When they apologize, I assure them that it all went together to create a very special and compassionate person; and if I have an opportunity I thank them for being a part of my life.
I wouldn’t be who I am if I hadn’t been who I was.
I was able to go back because I’ve learned to truly love myself. Without me, none of my relationships exist. What I hated before hasn’t changed, but my attitude has. Those whom I considered tormentors in my youth are now friends I look forward to seeing.
You know how hard it is in third-grade, but try 1953. They didn’t know learning disabilities back then. I had to stay after school one day to finish an arithmetic test. After 10 minutes I had to take a paddling; a swat for every problem I hadn’t finished. I had 10 problems to go when the bell rang. 10 minutes later, this frightened kid had 9. When I got home Mom and Dad did nothing about it. After all, I was a bright boy, and should have done better.
There’s more; the attitudes I experienced from teachers, mob bullying, my lack of friends and fights; oh, the fights. A black eye on my high school campus was usually mine, or I probably administered it.
I survived a 30-year self-imposed “exile” from my high school community because of my pain and; yes, embarrassment at my memories; but I’m back. I’ve reconnected with my surrogate siblings. Not surprisingly; but unfortunately; some of their memories center on our fights or on how they treated me. When they apologize, I assure them that it all went together to create a very special and compassionate person; and if I have an opportunity I thank them for being a part of my life.
I wouldn’t be who I am if I hadn’t been who I was.
I was able to go back because I’ve learned to truly love myself. Without me, none of my relationships exist. What I hated before hasn’t changed, but my attitude has. Those whom I considered tormentors in my youth are now friends I look forward to seeing.
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