A Collage of Memories

HOW we remember events and relationships is what we live by. If each of us took the time, we could name thousands of such "entries."

In 1994, I read a book that emphasized that point; THE MAN WHO WOULD NOT BE DEFEATED by B. Mitchell, a man who had suffered two debilitating events that could have killed him. He was severely disfigured in a traffic accident fire. His burns cost him several fingers and his good looks. Due to his injuries he temporarily lost his career as a multi-engine flight instructor. After regaining his licensing, he experienced an ice-related winter air crash that left him as a paraplegic, "confined" to a wheel chair. Although he qualified for a motorized chair, he declined owning one because it would likely serve to sink him deeper into concentration on his losses and disabilities. He chose instead to use a light-weight standard wheel chair. His motto was, "It's not what happens to you, it's what you do about it." Insurance settlements made him quite wealthy, and he went on the speaking circuit as a motivational speaker; often donating his entire fee back to a worthy organization where he had spoken.

It blew me away that he accomplished everything he did and all the good that came about in the aftermath of his injuries with no faith in God at all. He was a profound atheist.

Barely two weeks after reading his book, I found myself waking up on the pavement after I crashed into the back of a parked truck just two and a half blocks from home. I had intended to go for a 25-mile exercise ride and was distracted by a speedometer that was not working properly. I took a physical inventory of myself before I tried to get up, because I didn't want to cause further damage if I had been badly injured. I literally couldn't feel any sensations at all, and I only could locate my left hand; a body  part I could see but could barely move. Breathing was hard because the strap on my helmet restricted my airway.  Fortunately, my injuries left me with no long-term disability, even though now going on 18 years later I still have never fully felt the floor through my feet as I did before. (It took several years before I gained back enough feeling below my belt to say that I had "recovered" from my injuries.

As I lay there on the pavement, before emergency help arrived (thanks to neighbors calling 911), I remember that I started to react in some level of fear. Then I thought, "If Mitchell could do it without God, I can to it WITH God. 

It's truly not what happens to you. It's what you do about it. So, here below, I offer a relatively few of my foundational memories; not as a complaint, because I have done "something" about HOW I remember them; but as a starter to suggest that you might take such an inventory and think about "what you do about it."

Early Childhood and Grade School

·     Judy, my early elementary school girlfriend “chasing” me into Mom’s corn field. Somehow, she “always caught me” in the middle of the patch. ;)  ;)

·     Singing around the piano because there wasn't much music on the radio that Dad would let us hear & TV hadn't yet arrived in our small, Kansas town.

·     My brother and I singing duets in church when I was only 5-8 years old

·     Getting into trouble in kindergarten after building myself a tower of building blocks – specifically so I could bomb it and destroy it. When I bombed as I had planned, my teacher thought it was someone else’s tower and scolded me severely. She never accepted my explanation.

·     Miss Lewis, my first grade teacher; vaguely remembered except for the name, and seeing her at the Dillon’s grocery store in Larned. Mom thought it was something to see my reaction.

·     Mrs. Fromong, my second grade teacher; I don’t remember much other than her name. I don’t remember the year as any kind of hallmark in my life. I sort of remember that the class faced south. I believe I sat in the second row away from the east facing windows, just forward from the middle of the row.

·     Taking my brother Glenn’s bicycle from the rack at the high school, next to the elementary school, to ride it, and losing control. It resulted in heading down the hill on 11th Street. A friend of Glenn hopped on his bike and caught up with me about a block down the hill to get me stopped. It scared the dickens out of me, and I never tried something like that again.

·     The mean dog near the school that bit me several times on the leg … after I kicked at it. I never told anyone back then that I had "started it." The dog was destroyed. I never lamented his passing.

·     Dad concocting stories -- serial versions, of course -- for bedtime, that would take days to finish; He was a hillbilly, and one of their favorite pass-times was "telling lies" (stories and jokes).

High School and Teenage

·     Pastors in church who trusted me in helping to minister to a teenager my age who had stolen a car -- whom the pastor had gotten released to his custody

·     Friends; a very few who were close and always there; others stormy/volatile sometimes there, sometimes not

·     The knowledge in my heart that even though life wasn't always fun for me, Jesus was always my friend and always cared; Emanuel, God with us”

·     Frequent trips to Youth for Christ meetings in Oklahoma City

·     Trips to Youth for Christ Conventions in Wynona Lake, Indiana

·     Learning to check, when people say, “We’re behind you,” to see just how far behind you they are

·     Learning to stand on my own in Christ, because sometimes that was all I had

·     Mother kneeling by her bed every night, weeping as she held each of us (her seven children) up to God in prayer

·     The first time I saw my wife, Deanna; how I knew at the age of 17, "There's the girl I'm going to marry."

·     The joy of getting my H.S. Diploma

College and Adulthood; Early and Later

·     The many good years Deanna and I have had together -- nearly 50 of them now

·     Our two sons born 12/21/1966 and 7/05/1970

·     Struggling through college and seminary with very low reading speed; thus low comprehension

·     Finally solving the reading problem, by help from God, so that I finally was getting mostly A’s and B’s in my final year of grad school

·     When our sons had finally left home, finding that the "empty nest syndrome" was greatly over rated -- Why should we complain about success in a 25-year endeavor?

·     The joy of finishing college for Bachelor of Arts Degree

·     The sense of absolute satisfaction in accomplishing all the work of my Master of Divinity Degree ON TIME, with no extensions; one of 5 in a class of 35 to accomplish that

·     Helping to found a charity to help the poor and elderly in my home town with home repairs -- an organization still serving in much stronger ways than I could have dreamt 24 years ago

·     Seeing my sons in their adult life as they succeed (or not) in their endeavors; occasionally now taking calls from the eldest for help in thinking his business through

·     Volunteering to work on home projects for the elderly and disabled

·     Volunteering to work with the Mental Health Assn and finding that I now have a "larger family"

·     Knowing Christ and knowing that he knows me

·     Teaching others new skills

·     A dumb accident in 1994 that laid me up for several weeks, then tied me up for several years more once I was “on my feet”

·     Finally getting lined up with an Orthopedic Surgeon (3 years after the accident) who was more concerned about helping me heal naturally than about getting paid by my insurance company

·     Getting rid of some 95% of the pain, and learning new things about healing other things  with in the process; The doc said I had only come back some 85%, but she wasn’t inside this painful skin.

·     Never feeling really safe from personal, emotional attack and emotional blackmail

·     Praising God!

I hope it is clear that I will talk about what has happened, but that I expect it to be some small encouragement to you to do your own inventory. You KNOW there is much, much more that I could write; thousands of words on each entry above and would still never cover the whole. I invite and encourage response comments.